4 Ways To Stop Putting So Much Pressure On Yourself

Stop being your own worst enemy

Amardeep Parmar
5 min readJan 31, 2022


Original Photo by Andrea Piacquadio from Pexels

The pressure I put myself under sometimes cripples me.

Thinking about all my to-dos can make my mind go blank and my heart fall through my gut. I end up needing to sleep because I can barely function. Yet the rest is poor quality because I start remembering other things I haven’t done. I’ve spent far too much of my adult life in this toxic cycle.

Does this sound familiar?

The problem with ambition is we don’t know our own limits. Our views of success are warped by how we perceive others are doing.

Now through social media, we get to compare ourselves to role models who only show us their highlights. Rather than working out a sustainable pace of growth right for us, we use the most extreme examples as benchmarks. It can lead you to put yourself under the same intense pressure I have in the past.

You know this isn’t healthy. Here are four ways I use to stop myself from being my own worst enemy.

Memento Mori

Earlier this week, my building was literally on fire.

We’ve been having false alarms because of construction work, so I took an extra half minute to finish writing an email when the siren started. By the time I made it all the way down the stairs, I could see a crowd outside. They were all pointing their phone cameras at something above my head. Thick black smoke poured out of one of the apartments.

Luckily, no one was hurt and the damage didn’t spread. Even with my short delay, I was one of the first ten people out of the building out of well over a hundred.

As we stood outside watching the fire service at work, I wasn’t worried about my possessions at all. Yes, if the fire spread, it would be a nightmare financially but at that moment it didn’t matter.

What I was thinking about was the stoic mantra of “memento mori”. It means “remember that you have to die”. Did I seriously just risk my life to finish writing an email?

So much of what we beat ourselves up about doesn’t matter. When I’m dead, will anyone remember my email? When you’re killing yourself to reach a goal…



Amardeep Parmar

Founder of The BAE HQ @amardeepbae + Host of Entrepreneur's Handbook ☆ I help the ambitious develop deep self awareness ☆ https://antiburnout.mindfuldriven.com